Thursday, December 16, 2010

Songstress

When I sing the Universe becomes a gaping hole into which I soar upon wings propelled by the connection to those for whom I perform.

I become lyrics flowing like water upon a dry river bed greedily swallowed by the thirsty spirits of those who can hear me.

My own spirit searches eagerly for those who flow with me hungry to sate their own emptiness as pitch changes, emotions unfurl and our worlds entwine.

Everything else falls away as our spirits meet: there is no time, no bills, no foes, and no doubts, nothing to hinder the angel that sings praises to Creation, Creator and Created.

I see myself in the hearts of those who listen, those who extend beyond merely hearing, I feel completed as they join me absorbing me into themselves when I sing.

I can remember watching Sonny and Cher when I was pre-teen. My dad hated it! Probably the fuel for my attachment but that's a story for another day. What moved me to believe I could sing was a belief that somehow I was meant to. It's sounds even crazier if you say it out loud trust me. I am moved so strongly by certain women singers, with music or acapella that it could be akin to grief. It seriously feels like someone has kicked me square in the chest and I can't breathe it's so tight. I feel that I have lost something, it's this aching sense that singing is a part of me that I need.

Truthfully, I haven't spent a lot of time analyzing this part of the IT that makes me, me simply because I have a decent voice and I have so many other items of interest on my "fix it" list that it makes no sense to touch what ain't broken. I am curious though as to what this strong reaction means, it isn't that I think that anyone could actually give me an iron clad answer, but I am open to other opinions on the matter.

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